Felix Breche (WIP)

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Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Fri Jan 17, 2014 2:47 pm

gWorld of Darkness modeled hunter character
Name: (The name of your character, including alias or nickname if appropriate.)

Felix Breche

Age: (How old is your character? The forum moves in relative real time, meaning it is the same year in the game as it is in reality, and relatively the same month.)

35 years old

Gender: (Male, female, hermaphroditic, non-gender, trans*? You decide.)

Male

Appearance: (What your character looks like, including clothing.)
Standing at 5'8 tall. White Caucasian male. 170 lbs with the majority of the bulk in in his arms and legs. More fatty tissue than muscle. Hairstyle modeled after a Hollister model, spiked up in front. 2 inch haircut with gelled up bangs. Sandy brown hair. Dark brown eyes. His face is rounded in appearance, his cheeks filling out to make his chin less distinguishable. He has stubble around his mouth, only occasionally keeping up with facial grooming that is a little longer than a 5 o'clock shadow. There are wrinkles around his eyes usually barely noticeable until he laughs.
His clothing consists of his waiter uniform, which he wears almost all the time: a white tshirt worn underneath a white dress shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Shirt completely buttoned up with a silk black tie. He has black slacks and a leather black dress belt with a gold buckle. He has black socks and a pair of black born flaagons.
https://www.shoe-store.net/images/products/flanagen-28187-62904-big.jpg


When not working in the restaurant, his appearance is very similar, except he takes off his tie, and unbuttoned the first two top buttons and untucks his shirt.

Occupation: waiter at a diner (Tomato Cove)

Equipment: (What your character prefers to use in combat. Special weapons are acceptable, but magical weapons are frowned upon and require much explanation. The same can be said about more outlandish science-based equipment. Also includes any items worth mentioning your character has on hand.)

Not a combat character. Would appreciate playing Felix as a non-combatant.

(Will eventually have M&P 40 once he joins the DPCC)

blessed Kershaw 1830 OSO sweet knife with stainless-steel blade and Nylon handle with speedsafe
http://www.amazon.com/Kershaw-1830-Stainless-Steel-Handle-SpeedSafe/dp/B00172A3DE
The blade itself is stainless steel 3 inches long. It's been blessed. It has a speedsafe opening system. The handle is plastic and has a “scales pattern” as advertised. The handle has a small black leather strap added in to be worn around the wrist. There is half a small white sticker stuck onto the handle from either the previous owner or the owner before that at one time said “Clearance $14.99” The sticker has been peeled so the bottom half is torn off but the price is still legible.

Sterling model 302 stainless-steel in a homemade ankle holster.
The majority of the gun is stainless steel except for the grip, which is black plastic. It has a small 6 round magazine and a 2.5 inch barrel. .22lr.
http://www.rifletech.net/ste28-2.jpg
The ankle holster is nothing amazing. Its a piece of cut leather held together with glue and wrapped around the ankle with velcro.


Race: (One of the available races from the race sheet.)

Special human

Abilities: (The ability of your character befitting his/her/its race.)

Sight: able to see a certain set of monsters that appear human to people not imbued with the sight. After much thought,  I think my character's special sight would be able to see only special infected individuals. These individuals usually appear human to people but with the sight, usually look rotted or wrong in some way. These monsters mostly fit the description of really bad humans, some which have a very slight increase in strength.
Shared wounds: Concentrating on a target, for a short time, his opponents suffer the same injuries he endures. This may seem overpowered, but I plan to play as a non-combatant as much as possible so I don't forsee I'd use it too much in combat against other rp'ers on the site. This ability lasts only seconds and requires almost complete concentration of the target. Usually the target must be within sight and using this ability could have grave side effects such as in my sample, blacking out. It should be obvious, but my character must suffer the same wounds inflicted.


Organization: (Which group do you serve?)
Independent will join DPCC shortly after beginning rp.

Personality: (Everything that makes your character unique. How they feel, act, present themselves, think, etc.)

Determined, and a lot of the time completely selfless. Recently, he's been on the edge of depression. People have said he has a brilliant mind. Customers have two opinions of him. Some tell him they appreciate him always smiling. Others ask him why he only pretends to smile. Worked 7 days a week at the local Tomato Cove in Nappa California. He likes exploring the city and eating at all the different restaurants he can find. He has no sense of fashion sense but doesn't care anyways. He wishes he had a better job, a job that he could actually help people with besides taking orders. Around new people, he can seem spacy. Most of the time, he's thinking about other things and not too concerned with introductions.

Rank: (What rank do you hold in the group you serve? Pick ranks that are appropriate to your group.)

D or equivalent of lowest rank.

Biography: (Your character's life, from beginning to the current time. Note: Characters cannot be born as supernatural creatures.)

Born, raised and grew up in Nappa. He had a normal family; mother, father, older brother (5 years older), and younger sister (9 years younger). His family was highly religious except for himself. He always felt that he would be damned to hell for believing in evolution so he could never commit to church. As a child, he was a happy kid. He played basketball with his brother, but never joined a team. He was pretty popular in elementary school. He kissed his first girl at ten during a 7 minutes in heaven game at a birthday party, then his first guy at 12. Word spread quick and he began being called “queer” and “faggot”, and his family all but disowned him except his older brother. This, and switching from a middle school to a highschool drifted him apart from his former friends. He didn't let this stop him, and though he didn't bother to make any new strong friendships in highschool, he went on to graduate high school with a 3.8 gpa. In his senior year, his brother left for London. Felix planned to go to Stanford until he met Alex at a biker bar one night. Always wanting to try new food, Felix had just come to try their burgers, but Alex approached him, starting their long relationship from there on with the words “You're cute”. Within the first 2 months, they were the perfect odd couple. They moved in together within the first month, a risky move, but Felix was confident. Also, he was glad he could move away from home. Now that his brother was gone, it was pretty apparent that his parents didn't like him very much. In their relationship, Alex was the more outgoing of the two, and often pushed Felix into social gathering at local clubs, which Felix didn't mind. Felix changed his mind at the last minute, deciding not go move away to attend college at Stanford so he'd have enough money and time to spend with Alex. The school semester started and Alex instead begin his college career at Nappa Valley College and worked part time at the local Tomato Cove part time to help Alex pay for rent. After the sixth month, Felix noticed a change in Alex. She began coming home late and jittery ontop of that. Felix suspected she was cheating on him, but the truth was much worse. Some of her galpals from the club started doing this new drug. Alex got addicted quick. Before she lost herself completely, she decided to keep it a secret from Felix so he wouldn't suffer the same fate. By the time Felix figured out what was going on, she wasn't the same. She spent all day at home in bed laughing to herself. Alex was fired from her job pretty quick because she stopped going to work, which left Felix with the bills. He decided to postpone college and picked up full time and overtime at Tomato Cove to try and support and hopefully wean Alex off her narcotics. Her condition kept getting worse though and she sometimes didn't come home for days, and when she finally did, she didn't say a word and didn't usually stay long. Felix hated seeing her this way and spent any free time he had not working digging, trying to figure out what this drug was and how to break her off it. He would spend over a decade doing this. Over the decade, he would take care of Alex, trying to figure out what the drug was and how to get her to quit. One day, Alex turned a knife on him when Felix got wind of the name of her supplier. She came at him with a knife, which is when Felix's abilities appeared. With his new abilities, he saw Alex as a decaying corpse, and accidentally used his ability of “shared wounds,” which caused Alex to suffer a stab wound herself. The strain of using his ability weighed heavily on Alex and he passed out almost instantly. Dying, the part of Alex that was still human, called an ambulance. The paramedics were only able to save Felix. After the death of Alex and nearly dying himself, Felix resumes his search for the supplier of this drug. He strikes up a deal with his boss at Tomato Cove and gets transferred to the Tomato Cove branch in London. Only known to himself, he is following a man he knows only as  Salvestro, the supplier. Luckily, his older brother now lives in London. Felix knows his brother works for a military organization of some sort but not sure which (is actually DPCC). Upon reaching London, he will find out his brother is dead.
Sample: (A short sample of how you intend to play. A practice roleplay can take the place of a sample. Only required for first time members, optional for all others.)

It felt like it had taken him a lifetime, but Felix finally had it! Taking small sips of hot coffee, he sat alone in his makeshift office, a large empty closet he had shoved an IKEA desk into years ago. Now, it was full of clutter. The walls were covered completely with sheets of paper which eventually spilled over to the floor where more stacks of paper accumulated for the last several years. All of these were written in Felix's neat handwriting, all of them clues he had gathered about the substance Arcadine. Alex growled from the bedroom across the way and Felix got up to check on her.
She was in bed, exactly where he'd left her, just as she always was. Today, she was giggling to herself, repeating “Monsoon, Monsoon” over and over.
“How are you feeling today?” Felix asked, placing a hand on her cheek.
Alex turned her head quickly to nip at his fingers, but Felix was used to this behavior and pulled his hand back expectantly.
“Candy?” Alex asked.
“No candy.” Felix said.
Alex wailed loudly and flailed her arms around.
Felix put his arms on her shoulder reassuringly. “It's going to be okay,” Felix said. He waited for Alex to quiet before he went into the bathroom where he kept the anxiety pills. He thought it was helping, but he wasn't sure. Alex seemed to have bottomed out years ago; she wasn't getting worse, but she sure wasn't getting better.
Felix quickly grabbed the anxiety medication and placed the two pills in his pocket and filled a glass of water before closing the medicine cabinet. He paused as he saw his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He wasn't expecting what he saw. He was old. It wasn't the fresh face of his youth staring back at him. It wasn't a young man fresh out of high school. He had put on a considerable amount of weight. There were creases around the corners of his eyes accompanied by eyebags. He badly needed a shave. A rush of anger suddenly hit him. That thing was wasting his life. It wasn't Alex anymore. Whatever this drug was, it had sapped Alex of the person she had once been, the person he had once loved. Felix took a deep breath, holding back tears. It took every once of effort, but he shook his thoughts away. He had to get Alex the anxiety pills.
Several hours later after Felix got Alex to fall asleep, he took a nap, something he needed badly. He had to work that night. After a dreamless sleep, Felix awoke to the loud bang of the front door being closed. Alex just left. She would leave to get more of that drug and come back even more delirious than when she left. A few times Felix tried to follow Alex, but every time, she seemed to disappear around the corner or would vanish once she entered a store.
Now, she would be gone for a while, and Felix didn't have work for another hour. He had time to return to his office. Felix's half empty coffee cup from earlier this morning was still there, cold now, but Felix chugged down the bitter brown liquid anyways.  Arcadine. Suddenly, Felix remembered he made a discovery this morning. He quickly breezed over his notes to refresh his memory. He had talked to a few of Alex's friends, some more far gone than Alex was. Those friends led him to more friends, and finally, after several months ago, he had a name. Salvestro. Felix doubted that Salvestro was even his real name, but he was sure this Salvestro guy had something to do with the Arcadine drug. He wondered whether Alex had muttered Salvestro in one of her less chaotic states and he had written it off as incoherent babbling. From the data he had gathered from talking to Alex's circle, Felix knew Salvestro had to be somewhere close by. He would find out soon enough. He would ask Alex about it after he got off work. Sometimes, she was unusually coherent just after she came home, as if some part of her was trying to resist the drug before it completely took over her for days.
That night, Felix came home around 3am after his shift. The lights were on in the house, which was unusual. Felix slammed the front door behind him and called out for Alex.
“I'm in the kitchen.” Alex said.
Felix froze. She sounded like Alex, the real Alex. Felix nearly dropped the bread sticks he had taken from work as he rushed into the kitchen. Alex stopped cutting the bread she was working on and turned to him and smiled. “How was work?”
“Alex?” Felix asked.
“Yeah?” Alex asked, confused.
“What are you doing?” Felix asked.
“Making a sandwich. Want one?” Alex said. “Since you're right by the fridge, can you get the mayo?”
“You're better?” Felix asked.
“Better than?” Alex looked confused. “Are you alright?”
Felix sat down and broke into tears. He didn't know what happened, but Alex was Alex again. She came and sat down next to him and rubbed his shoulder. “It's going to be okay,” Alex said. “Maybe you should stop.”
“I can't stop.” Felix said. I need to work to pay the bills.
“Not work,” Alex said, withdrawing her arm from his shoulder. “Stop looking for Arcadine.”
Felix shot his glance up at Alex, who punched him in face, knocking him off the chair and onto the floor. Her punch landed a few inches from his nose, missing the bridge. It hurt, but Felix recovered pretty quick to face Alex whose gaze was now vacant as she grasped the knife that she had been using to make the sandwich.
“Felix!” She said. “Felis.” “Feelis.” “Feel this.”
“Alex, Don't do this.” Felix pleaded.
“Right there. Right there!” Alex yelled. “Don't stop!”
“Who's Salvestro?” Felix asked. He crawled away from Alex. He wasn't trying to get anywhere in particular, just away from the knife.
“How you do Salvestro know?” Alex asked.
Felix wasn't particularly a religious man, but he prayed to God, Jehovah, any higher power he remember hearing about. He knew this was the end. “I'm sorry.” He said.
“Ready to meet Salvestro?” Alex asked, taking a step towards him with the knife.
“I'm sorry.” Felix said. “I couldn't save you.” Felix was beyond scared, but strangely, it wasn't fear he felt strongest now. It was awkwardness. Even as he faced his crazed girlfriend, he didn't recognize her. How had she become this? How could she have left and he not have realized?
That's when it happened. It started as a dull ache, but quickly escalated to a sharp pain behind his eyes. Felix scrunched his eyes shut in pain, hoping the feeling would pass quickly so he could see if Alex lunged at him. The pain behind his eyes seemed to slowly oozed down behind his nose, and finally to the back of his throat. It burned, but eventually the pain subsided and Felix opened his eyes and spat out blood that had collected in the back of his throat. Felix was horrified at what he saw. It wasn't Alex that stood before him. Maybe it had once been, but not anymore. One of her eyes were missing, an empty socket was all that was left. The majority of her face was covered with a black green mold and her hair was falling off her head as he looked at her.
Felix was terrified. “I'm so sorry Alex.”
The thing smiled. “Sorry? For what?”
“I'm sorry I couldn't save you.” Felix said, voice trembling. This couldn't be real.
“I'm sorry too,” Alex said, stepping over Felix and readying the knife.
A new feeling washed over Felix. Regret. In his final moment, he looked back at his life. He didn't regret meeting Alex or that he didn't get to go to college, or even that he had taken care of her for the last ten years. He regretted that Alex had been the one to suffer more than he had. He looked up at this thing that was once Alex. He hated this thing. He wished his could could kill it. He wished it would kill him if Alex could come back. A warm feeling gathered behind his throat again, and Felix spit out more blood.
“Good bye, Felix,” it said, and it plunged the knife into his stomach.
Felix blacked out almost instantly, but he could have sworn he heard screaming.
Several months later, Felix gives the mousy girl with buck teeth a hug.
“I'm going to miss you,” She says.
“Don't worry boss, I'll still be in the family,” Felix jokes.
“You can't call me boss anymore,” the girl says, genuinely looking sad. Surprisingly, Felix feels a little sad too.
That night he packs whatever last minute things he has and says goodbye to this life. Since that night, he hadn't been able to sleep. He still wasn't sure what happened. The police say that Alex stabbed him in the gut before stabbing herself. They told him she must've felt guilty and dialed 911. She didn't make it. Luckily, the doctors were able to save Felix. This is what they told him. Felix isn't sure this is the truth. When she stabbed him, Felix felt himself stabbing that thing, right in the gut. He knew it was impossible, but this whole thing was impossible. On a whim, he could open his eyes and look for monsters, something he was still trying to get used to. More than once, Felix thought of checking himself into an asylum, but he couldn't bring himself to do so, not when Salvestro was still out there hurting other people. The other night, he must've been getting close to Salvestro. He had a tussle with a scrawny kid with canine teeth filling his whole mouth that someone threw him across a parking lot, but after a few hours of beating that thing, it told him London. Felix didn't know if it was telling the truth, and it was a longshot, but he was sick of this place. He had to leave, and what better place than London. His older brother, Michael worked there now, some military something. He didn't like to talk about it too much. Michael was the only person who kept in touch with him. His parents all but disowned him after they found out about what he'd been doing with his life. Michael didn't approve either, but he let Felix make his own choice, and Felix was grateful of that. He planned to live with Michael until he found an apartment, then he'd hunt Salvestro. He'd do it for Alex, and every other innocent that was on Arcadine. He knew they were somehow all connected. The last thing Felix did before he went to sleep in his bed for the last time was make sure Alex's photo was tucked neatly into the sleeve of his wallet. Tomorrow, he'd head for London.
Sample fight post:
“ tussle with a scrawny kid” from rp sample
The scrawny kid tried to ambush Felix after work as he walked into his car. The scrawny kid didn't know Alex had the sight. After spotting the scrawny kid, Felix rushed to his car and screeched out of the parking lot. The thing must was following close behind on a motorcycle. Felix made sure he had his gloves on before he drove over to one of the bad spots of Nappa. If you looked hard enough, you could find a deserted lot. Felix drove to a deserted lot beside a hotel scheduled for demolition.
Felix parked and turned off his engine before getting out of the car. The thing pulled up right next to him.
“Hey man, I got something for you.” it said.
To the naked eye, the thing looked like a skinny high school kid. Felix activated his sight, feeling the blood well up in his throat. To him, the thing now looked like a mummy with deep blood stained bandages over it's body. Felix spit the blood on the thing's shoes before he punched the thing in the face. It yowled in pain and fell on the floor in surprise, but it was more shocked and wounded and got up pretty quick.
The thing showed Felix the berretta it had wrapped between bandages on it's waist before it pulled out an intimidating looking hunting knife instead. “Only cuz I like you,” it said.
Felix ran. He took off for the hotel. The mummy followed but could barely keep up. Felix was afraid it'd shoot him in the back but it didn't. Entering the building, Felix rushed to the fourth floor and hid inside one of the rooms and closed the door. He waited. It only took about a minute before the thing was coming up the staircase. It was wheezing and out of breath. Felix could have sworn he heard a snarl. That's when Felix called the prepaid cellphone he had planted in the room down the hall earlier that day. The thing rushed down the hall towards the noise, and as quietly as he could, Felix opened the door, aimed and fired all 6 rounds from his stirling into the thing. The mummy fell hard and Felix moved in quick, pummeling the thing in the head, while grabbing for it's gun. His mixed effort gained him the gun but the thing was able to stab him in his left thigh. Pain shot through Felix's body and he almost dropped the gun. With a kick from the thing to his face, he did. The gun sailed somewhere behind him down the hall. Felix limped to a standing position. He could stand, but barely. The thing hobbled towards him shakily. Felix knew he had hurt it pretty bad. Felix limped as fast as he could down the hall, but the thing was right behind him. It was the faster of the two now. The thing stabbed towards Felix's face, and he was able to catch the thing's wrist, purely by luck. Felix aimed for the thing's throat and got a punch in before he pushed the thing back. Felix hoped his punch to the throat killed the thing, but he didn't count on it. Felix limped away and finally, he skirted his way around the pitfall he had made several days ago. The thing hobbled towards Felix. Anger seemed to propel it forward and it seemed to be moving much faster. For a moment the thing stopped near the pitfall and Felix was sure it knew. The thing smiled and picked up the beretta. Felix cursed himself. He didn't see it earlier, and now the thing was going to kill him. The thing turned on Felix with a smile. “Curiosity killed the-” with one misstep, the thing fell forward and down several stories.

Felix Breche

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Join date : 2014-01-17

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Tue Jan 28, 2014 5:42 pm

Not sure. what else should I be doing with this character?

Felix Breche

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Father Anthony Diem on Tue Jan 28, 2014 5:47 pm

Are you answering a question or would you like someone to take a look at this? Either way is perfectly fine of course. Just curious Smile

_________________
Almighty Lord, Word of God the Father, Jesus Christ, God and Lord of all creation; who gave to your holy apostles the power to tramp underfoot serpents and scorpions; who along with the other mandates to work miracles was pleased to grant them the authority to say: "Depart, you devils!" and by whose might Satan was made to fall from heaven like lightning; I humbly call on your holy name in fear and trembling, asking that you grant me, your unworthy servant, pardon for all my sins, steadfast faith, and the power - supported by your mighty arm - to confront with confidence and resolution this cruel demon. I ask this through you, Jesus Christ, our Lord and God, who are coming to judge both the living and the dead and the world by fire.
~Exorcism Rite of 1999.

http://duskcrusade.pro-forum.co.uk/t16-father-anthony-diem

Father Anthony Diem
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Location : Bleeding out

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:04 pm

I'm sorry. I meant "I'm not sure." I should not have written short hand. I'd appreciate if someone could give feedback or in the least, give me an idea where/what I should do with the character next.Thanks for responding so quick

Felix Breche

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Father Anthony Diem on Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:06 pm

Ya no problem Smile I'lltake a look at this thing and get back to you today with what I find.

_________________
Almighty Lord, Word of God the Father, Jesus Christ, God and Lord of all creation; who gave to your holy apostles the power to tramp underfoot serpents and scorpions; who along with the other mandates to work miracles was pleased to grant them the authority to say: "Depart, you devils!" and by whose might Satan was made to fall from heaven like lightning; I humbly call on your holy name in fear and trembling, asking that you grant me, your unworthy servant, pardon for all my sins, steadfast faith, and the power - supported by your mighty arm - to confront with confidence and resolution this cruel demon. I ask this through you, Jesus Christ, our Lord and God, who are coming to judge both the living and the dead and the world by fire.
~Exorcism Rite of 1999.

http://duskcrusade.pro-forum.co.uk/t16-father-anthony-diem

Father Anthony Diem
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Posts : 406
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Location : Bleeding out

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:06 pm

thanks. Much appreciated!

Felix Breche

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Father Anthony Diem on Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:16 pm

No problem.

_________________
Almighty Lord, Word of God the Father, Jesus Christ, God and Lord of all creation; who gave to your holy apostles the power to tramp underfoot serpents and scorpions; who along with the other mandates to work miracles was pleased to grant them the authority to say: "Depart, you devils!" and by whose might Satan was made to fall from heaven like lightning; I humbly call on your holy name in fear and trembling, asking that you grant me, your unworthy servant, pardon for all my sins, steadfast faith, and the power - supported by your mighty arm - to confront with confidence and resolution this cruel demon. I ask this through you, Jesus Christ, our Lord and God, who are coming to judge both the living and the dead and the world by fire.
~Exorcism Rite of 1999.

http://duskcrusade.pro-forum.co.uk/t16-father-anthony-diem

Father Anthony Diem
Admin

Posts : 406
Join date : 2013-10-09
Location : Bleeding out

Character sheet
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Race: Human

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Father Anthony Diem on Tue Jan 28, 2014 9:32 pm

first thing I noticed, and this really doesn't matter, but you can take out the parts in parenthesis. As those tell you what to write, we don't actually need them after you've written in that category. However Keep the bolded Age Name and etc, is required. Once again nothing much, Just looks cleaner.

Felix Breche wrote:gWorld of Darkness modeled hunter character
Name: (The name of your character, including alias or nickname if appropriate.)

Felix Breche

Age: (How old is your character? The forum moves in relative real time, meaning it is the same year in the game as it is in reality, and relatively the same month.)

35 years old

Gender: (Male, female, hermaphroditic, non-gender, trans*? You decide.)

Male

Appearance: (What your character looks like, including clothing.)
Standing at 5'8 tall. White Caucasian male. 170 lbs with the majority of the bulk in in his arms and legs. More fatty tissue than muscle. Hairstyle modeled after a Hollister model, spiked up in front. 2 inch haircut with gelled up bangs. Sandy brown hair. Dark brown eyes. His face is rounded in appearance, his cheeks filling out to make his chin less distinguishable. He has stubble around his mouth, only occasionally keeping up with facial grooming that is a little longer than a 5 o'clock shadow. There are wrinkles around his eyes usually barely noticeable until he laughs.
His clothing consists of his waiter uniform, which he wears almost all the time: a white tshirt worn underneath a white dress shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Shirt completely buttoned up with a silk black tie. He has black slacks and a leather black dress belt with a gold buckle. He has black socks and a pair of black born flaagons.
https://www.shoe-store.net/images/products/flanagen-28187-62904-big.jpg

what does this dress shirt look like, and maybe some more description of his face would be good. Not bad though Smile


When not working in the restaurant, his appearance is very similar, except he takes off his tie, and unbuttoned the first two top buttons and untucks his shirt.

Occupation: waiter at a diner (Tomato Cove)

Equipment: (What your character prefers to use in combat. Special weapons are acceptable, but magical weapons are frowned upon and require much explanation. The same can be said about more outlandish science-based equipment. Also includes any items worth mentioning your character has on hand.)

Not a combat character. Would appreciate playing Felix as a non-combatant.

Actually I kind of like this idea of non combat characters, being that Rp is more than just combat. But what this section entails is more than just combat, and since your character is not part of an org or anything. You might list his apartment or house as equipment. As well as a car maybe, Maybe his life savings. Just possessions things like that, whats in your house. I actually think we should add in something in the description accentuating that more. And obviously non of what I listed is required at all. Just examples \.

(Will eventually have M&P 40 once he joins the DPCC)

blessed Kershaw 1830 OSO sweet knife with stainless-steel blade and Nylon handle with speedsafe
http://www.amazon.com/Kershaw-1830-Stainless-Steel-Handle-SpeedSafe/dp/B00172A3DE
The blade itself is stainless steel 3 inches long. It's been blessed. It has a speedsafe opening system. The handle is plastic and has a “scales pattern” as advertised. The handle has a small black leather strap added in to be worn around the wrist. There is half a small white sticker stuck onto the handle from either the previous owner or the owner before that at one time said “Clearance $14.99” The sticker has been peeled so the bottom half is torn off but the price is still legible.

Sterling model 302 stainless-steel in a homemade ankle holster.
The majority of the gun is stainless steel except for the grip, which is black plastic. It has a small 6 round magazine and a 2.5 inch barrel. .22lr.
http://www.rifletech.net/ste28-2.jpg
The ankle holster is nothing amazing. Its a piece of cut leather held together with glue and wrapped around the ankle with velcro.


Ahhh, Here are some weapons. But as I said before, since he's not part of the org, what he owns and all that would be good to put in there.

Race: (One of the available races from the race sheet.)

Special human

Abilities: (The ability of your character befitting his/her/its race.)

Sight: able to see a certain set of monsters that appear human to people not imbued with the sight. After much thought,  I think my character's special sight would be able to see only special infected individuals. These individuals usually appear human to people but with the sight, usually look rotted or wrong in some way. These monsters mostly fit the description of really bad humans, some which have a very slight increase in strength.

(So a couple things, you make the sight sound like a mutation that A good chunk of people have. And that it is common to find people like this every so often. Or at least that other people have it. I owuld really like to know where this sight comes from, what gives him this power? I don't think it would be a genetic defect or something. Because it seems very supernatural, allowing him the ability to see "infected" people. Which I will address now actually. So the way I'm reading this, I'm thinking that the infected, are not actually a race that we have on this site, as of yet. I'm assuming you might mean vampires and the like, things that are classified as monsters. But I'm really not sure. Some explanation is needed here.)

Shared wounds: Concentrating on a target, for a short time, his opponents suffer the same injuries he endures. This may seem overpowered, but I plan to play as a non-combatant as much as possible so I don't forsee I'd use it too much in combat against other rp'ers on the site. This ability lasts only seconds and requires almost complete concentration of the target. Usually the target must be within sight and using this ability could have grave side effects such as in my sample, blacking out. It should be obvious, but my character must suffer the same wounds inflicted.

This ability isn't actually as terribly hard to get approved as you might think Smile Fortunately for you. As we already have a character with this ability. But what I'm going to ask is once again, we need more explination. Why does his concentration create a link between them? Is he psychic, Is he using witchcraft? (preferably not this as this s how another character accomplishes this.) Or something else entirely? Be creative, and so long as it is explained properly it shouldn't be a problem Smile

However a warning, The only person to attempt this so far was a vampire, for a good reason. It's almost suicide without regenerative abilities. Or it will mess your body the frik up if you try to inflict any real damage on someone else. Being that your human and all, if you try and use this against a monster, unless you kill yourself, or maim yourself horribly, then it won't really do any damage. But if your ok with this, it makes it very easier to approve this actually. As it really can't be overpowered.


Organization: (Which group do you serve?)
Independent will join DPCC shortly after beginning rp.

Personality: (Everything that makes your character unique. How they feel, act, present themselves, think, etc.)

Determined, and a lot of the time completely selfless. Recently, he's been on the edge of depression. People have said he has a brilliant mind. Customers have two opinions of him. Some tell him they appreciate him always smiling. Others ask him why he only pretends to smile. Worked 7 days a week at the local Tomato Cove in Nappa California. He likes exploring the city and eating at all the different restaurants he can find. He has no sense of fashion sense but doesn't care anyways. He wishes he had a better job, a job that he could actually help people with besides taking orders. Around new people, he can seem spacy. Most of the time, he's thinking about other things and not too concerned with introductions.

Hmm these seem not bad, Personality maybe a little short. But it actually covers everything I think.

Rank: (What rank do you hold in the group you serve? Pick ranks that are appropriate to your group.)

D or equivalent of lowest rank.

This rank would be for vampires, not for military organizations. You'd currently put, waiter, or nothing, or future private, or something like that, Depending on what you want. (also im not saying you'll start as I private, that's Gene's decision.)

Biography: (Your character's life, from beginning to the current time. Note: Characters cannot be born as supernatural creatures.)

Born, raised and grew up in Nappa. He had a normal family; mother, father, older brother (5 years older), and younger sister (9 years younger). His family was highly religious except for himself. He always felt that he would be damned to hell for believing in evolution so he could never commit to church.

(The church, at least the catholic church believes in evolution. Just thought I'd put that out htere. I could see maybe some denomination of protestant, but I would name a specific so as to avoid insulting someone. I'd actually recommend just making it some kind of privately started church, independent, or non denominational as I would say.)

As a child, he was a happy kid. He played basketball with his brother, but never joined a team. He was pretty popular in elementary school. He kissed his first girl at ten during a 7 minutes in heaven game at a birthday party, then his first guy at 12. Word spread quick and he began being called “queer” and “faggot”, and his family all but disowned him except his older brother.

Ouch, That's brutal. Disowned him nearly, that sounds pretty harsh. A great grandma of mine, who was a devout catholic, praying a rosary every day. Had three sonds who turned out gay, and she never considered something like that. Obviously I'm sure there are highly religious families that might do this, I guess I'm just saying that not all highly religious people have to be anti homosexual bigots, and while you haven't mentioned a denomination, which as I said before, might be best to make it non denominational. I know for a fact that most catechisms would say to respect people wiht homosexual feelings. At least I know the catholic one does, I'm willing to bet that things like Anglican, and Lutheran would too.

This, and switching from a middle school to a highschool drifted him apart from his former friends. He didn't let this stop him, and though he didn't bother to make any new strong friendships in highschool, he went on to graduate high school with a 3.8 gpa.

(Friking awesome gpa man. Nothing wrong with that, But I think he might be doing better in life, I mean he's just a waiter as it is, and like thirty five years of age.)

In his senior year, his brother left for London. Felix planned to go to Stanford until he met Alex at a biker bar one night. Always wanting to try new food, Felix had just come to try their burgers, but Alex approached him, starting their long relationship from there on with the words “You're cute”. Within the first 2 months, they were the perfect odd couple. They moved in together within the first month, a risky move,

Why was it risky? Were they moving a little fast or something?

but Felix was confident. Also, he was glad he could move away from home. Now that his brother was gone, it was pretty apparent that his parents didn't like him very much. In their relationship, Alex was the more outgoing of the two, and often pushed Felix into social gathering at local clubs, which Felix didn't mind. Felix changed his mind at the last minute, deciding not go move away to attend college at Stanford so he'd have enough money and time to spend with Alex.

Woah Woah Woah, What? You switched topics really quick there, from social gatherings to going to college, I didn't even know he was planning that. Just a little fast. Nothing to big though.

The school semester started and Alex instead begin his college career at Nappa Valley College and worked part time at the local Tomato Cove part time to help Alex pay for rent. After the sixth month, Felix noticed a change in Alex. She

Wait, Alex is a female? Why do his parents hate him then? I thought the reason they disliked him was because of him kissing a guy, and getting involved with a man? But since he's in a serious relationship with a girl, wouldn't they be happy about that? It seems harsh they would just hate him for what he was born like. But hey, I won't actually tell you to change this, as it is obviously possible. Just another thing I thought I'd mention.

began coming home late and jittery ontop of that. Felix suspected she was cheating on him, but the truth was much worse. Some of her galpals from the club started doing this new drug. Alex got addicted quick. Before she lost herself completely, she decided to keep it a secret from Felix so he wouldn't suffer the same fate. By the time Felix figured out what was going on, she wasn't the same. She spent all day at home in bed laughing to herself. Alex was fired from her job pretty quick because she stopped going to work, which left Felix with the bills. He decided to postpone college and picked up full time and overtime at Tomato Cove to try and support and hopefully wean Alex off her narcotics.

I thought he had already given up college? Seems slightly redundant.

Her condition kept getting worse though and she sometimes didn't come home for days, and when she finally did, she didn't say a word and didn't usually stay long. Felix hated seeing her this way and spent any free time he had not working digging, trying to figure out what this drug was and how to break her off it.

never tried an intervention?

He would spend over a decade doing this. Over the decade, he would take care of Alex, trying to figure out what the drug was and how to get her to quit. One day, Alex turned a knife on him when Felix got wind of the name of her supplier. She came at him with a knife, which is when Felix's abilities appeared. With his new abilities, he saw Alex as a decaying corpse, and accidentally used his ability of “shared wounds,” which caused Alex to suffer a stab wound herself. The strain of using his ability weighed heavily on Alex and he passed out almost instantly.

Kind of hard to follow, but why he isn't further in life makes sense now. Not sure what your trying to say here, about who passed out, and you said she came at him with a knife in as many sentences. Also did his abilities come out because of his life being threatened? And is Alex a vampire or something? Or does this drug make them corrupted in his eyes?

Dying, the part of Alex that was still human, called an ambulance. The paramedics were only able to save Felix. After the death of Alex and nearly dying himself, Felix resumes his search for the supplier of this drug.

But if the same damage was done to him that killed another human being why did he survive? Also, I'm really lost on what Alex is, What do you mean part human? and why did her generosity pop up right after she tried Killing Felix. I mena I owuld understand if it was because she wanted to save herself. But the way you right it is that she was doing it for Felix.

He strikes up a deal with his boss at Tomato Cove and gets transferred to the Tomato Cove branch in London. Only known to himself, he is following a man he knows only as  Salvestro, the supplier.

So he found the guy? How did he find this guy all of the sudden after a decade of searching?

Luckily, his older brother now lives in London. Felix knows his brother works for a military organization of some sort but not sure which (is actually DPCC). Upon reaching London, he will find out his brother is dead.

how does he find this out? Wouldn't his being in a secret military organization be kept on the down low, especially if he was killed in action? Though I suppose maybe this is just another thing for gene to decide.

Sample: (A short sample of how you intend to play. A practice roleplay can take the place of a sample. Only required for first time members, optional for all others.)

It felt like it had taken him a lifetime, but Felix finally had it! Taking small sips of hot coffee, he sat alone in his makeshift office, a large empty closet he had shoved an IKEA desk into years ago. Now, it was full of clutter. The walls were covered completely with sheets of paper which eventually spilled over to the floor where more stacks of paper accumulated for the last several years. All of these were written in Felix's neat handwriting, all of them clues he had gathered about the substance Arcadine. Alex growled from the bedroom across the way and Felix got up to check on her.
She was in bed, exactly where he'd left her, just as she always was. Today, she was giggling to herself, repeating “Monsoon, Monsoon” over and over.
“How are you feeling today?” Felix asked, placing a hand on her cheek.
Alex turned her head quickly to nip at his fingers, but Felix was used to this behavior and pulled his hand back expectantly.
“Candy?” Alex asked.
“No candy.” Felix said.
Alex wailed loudly and flailed her arms around.
Felix put his arms on her shoulder reassuringly. “It's going to be okay,” Felix said. He waited for Alex to quiet before he went into the bathroom where he kept the anxiety pills. He thought it was helping, but he wasn't sure. Alex seemed to have bottomed out years ago; she wasn't getting worse, but she sure wasn't getting better.
Felix quickly grabbed the anxiety medication and placed the two pills in his pocket and filled a glass of water before closing the medicine cabinet. He paused as he saw his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He wasn't expecting what he saw. He was old. It wasn't the fresh face of his youth staring back at him. It wasn't a young man fresh out of high school.

Thirty five isn't the old. I mean ya, no high schooler, but he's not even middle aged yet.

He had put on a considerable amount of weight. There were creases around the corners of his eyes accompanied by eyebags. He badly needed a shave. A rush of anger suddenly hit him. That thing was wasting his life. It wasn't Alex anymore. Whatever this drug was, it had sapped Alex of the person she had once been, the person he had once loved. Felix took a deep breath, holding back tears. It took every once of effort, but he shook his thoughts away. He had to get Alex the anxiety pills.
Several hours later after Felix got Alex to fall asleep, he took a nap, something he needed badly. He had to work that night. After a dreamless sleep, Felix awoke to the loud bang of the front door being closed. Alex just left. She would leave to get more of that drug and come back even more delirious than when she left. A few times Felix tried to follow Alex, but every time, she seemed to disappear around the corner or would vanish once she entered a store.
Now, she would be gone for a while, and Felix didn't have work for another hour. He had time to return to his office. Felix's half empty coffee cup from earlier this morning was still there, cold now, but Felix chugged down the bitter brown liquid anyways.  Arcadine. Suddenly, Felix remembered he made a discovery this morning. He quickly breezed over his notes to refresh his memory. He had talked to a few of Alex's friends, some more far gone than Alex was. Those friends led him to more friends, and finally, after several months ago, he had a name. Salvestro. Felix doubted that Salvestro was even his real name, but he was sure this Salvestro guy had something to do with the Arcadine drug. He wondered whether Alex had muttered Salvestro in one of her less chaotic states and he had written it off as incoherent babbling. From the data he had gathered from talking to Alex's circle, Felix knew Salvestro had to be somewhere close by. He would find out soon enough. He would ask Alex about it after he got off work. Sometimes, she was unusually coherent just after she came home, as if some part of her was trying to resist the drug before it completely took over her for days.
That night, Felix came home around 3am after his shift. The lights were on in the house, which was unusual. Felix slammed the front door behind him and called out for Alex.
“I'm in the kitchen.” Alex said.
Felix froze. She sounded like Alex, the real Alex. Felix nearly dropped the bread sticks he had taken from work as he rushed into the kitchen. Alex stopped cutting the bread she was working on and turned to him and smiled. “How was work?”
“Alex?” Felix asked.
“Yeah?” Alex asked, confused.
“What are you doing?” Felix asked.
“Making a sandwich. Want one?” Alex said. “Since you're right by the fridge, can you get the mayo?”
“You're better?” Felix asked.
“Better than?” Alex looked confused. “Are you alright?”
Felix sat down and broke into tears. He didn't know what happened, but Alex was Alex again. She came and sat down next to him and rubbed his shoulder. “It's going to be okay,” Alex said. “Maybe you should stop.”
“I can't stop.” Felix said. I need to work to pay the bills.
“Not work,” Alex said, withdrawing her arm from his shoulder. “Stop looking for Arcadine.”
Felix shot his glance up at Alex, who punched him in face, knocking him off the chair and onto the floor. Her punch landed a few inches from his nose, missing the bridge. It hurt, but Felix recovered pretty quick to face Alex whose gaze was now vacant as she grasped the knife that she had been using to make the sandwich.
“Felix!” She said. “Felis.” “Feelis.” “Feel this.”
“Alex, Don't do this.” Felix pleaded.
“Right there. Right there!” Alex yelled. “Don't stop!”
“Who's Salvestro?” Felix asked. He crawled away from Alex. He wasn't trying to get anywhere in particular, just away from the knife.
“How you do Salvestro know?” Alex asked.
Felix wasn't particularly a religious man, but he prayed to God, Jehovah, any higher power he remember hearing about. He knew this was the end. “I'm sorry.” He said.
“Ready to meet Salvestro?” Alex asked, taking a step towards him with the knife.
“I'm sorry.” Felix said. “I couldn't save you.” Felix was beyond scared, but strangely, it wasn't fear he felt strongest now. It was awkwardness. Even as he faced his crazed girlfriend, he didn't recognize her. How had she become this? How could she have left and he not have realized?

Didn't he realize that when he got angry, and had to restrain himself from doing something rash because he realized it wasn't the real alex?

That's when it happened. It started as a dull ache, but quickly escalated to a sharp pain behind his eyes. Felix scrunched his eyes shut in pain, hoping the feeling would pass quickly so he could see if Alex lunged at him. The pain behind his eyes seemed to slowly oozed down behind his nose, and finally to the back of his throat. It burned, but eventually the pain subsided and Felix opened his eyes and spat out blood that had collected in the back of his throat. Felix was horrified at what he saw. It wasn't Alex that stood before him. Maybe it had once been, but not anymore. One of her eyes were missing, an empty socket was all that was left. The majority of her face was covered with a black green mold and her hair was falling off her head as he looked at her.
Felix was terrified. “I'm so sorry Alex.”
The thing smiled. “Sorry? For what?”
“I'm sorry I couldn't save you.” Felix said, voice trembling. This couldn't be real.
“I'm sorry too,” Alex said, stepping over Felix and readying the knife.
A new feeling washed over Felix. Regret. In his final moment, he looked back at his life. He didn't regret meeting Alex or that he didn't get to go to college, or even that he had taken care of her for the last ten years. He regretted that Alex had been the one to suffer more than he had. He looked up at this thing that was once Alex. He hated this thing. He wished his could could kill it. He wished it would kill him if Alex could come back. A warm feeling gathered behind his throat again, and Felix spit out more blood.
“Good bye, Felix,” it said, and it plunged the knife into his stomach.
Felix blacked out almost instantly, but he could have sworn he heard screaming.
Several months later, Felix gives the mousy girl with buck teeth a hug.
“I'm going to miss you,” She says.
“Don't worry boss, I'll still be in the family,” Felix jokes.
“You can't call me boss anymore,” the girl says, genuinely looking sad. Surprisingly, Felix feels a little sad too.
That night he packs whatever last minute things he has and says goodbye to this life. Since that night, he hadn't been able to sleep. He still wasn't sure what happened. The police say that Alex stabbed him in the gut before stabbing herself. They told him she must've felt guilty and dialed 911. She didn't make it. Luckily, the doctors were able to save Felix. This is what they told him. Felix isn't sure this is the truth. When she stabbed him, Felix felt himself stabbing that thing, right in the gut. He knew it was impossible, but this whole thing was impossible. On a whim, he could open his eyes and look for monsters, something he was still trying to get used to. More than once, Felix thought of checking himself into an asylum, but he couldn't bring himself to do so, not when Salvestro was still out there hurting other people. The other night, he must've been getting close to Salvestro. He had a tussle with a scrawny kid with canine teeth filling his whole mouth that someone threw him across a parking lot,

Might want to mention this in the history...

but after a few hours of beating that thing,

Holy frik, how is this guy getting away with torture like this? I mean everyone else thinks there human, and you don't really make this guy out to be someone who could get away from the law, having no skills or knowledge of how to do so, after torturing something, probably to death after hours.

it told him London. Felix didn't know if it was telling the truth, and it was a longshot, but he was sick of this place. He had to leave, and what better place than London. His older brother, Michael worked there now, some military something. He didn't like to talk about it too much. Michael was the only person who kept in touch with him. His parents all but disowned him after they found out about what he'd been doing with his life.

Ya, What a douche bag for taking care of his extremely sick girlfriend.

Michael

Who is michael? his boss? I mean, I knew that she is a girl. But thats the best guess I can make at the moment. Also this drags on so much...It would fit considerably better in his history.

didn't approve either, but he let Felix make his own choice, and Felix was grateful of that. He planned to live with Michael until he found an apartment, then he'd hunt Salvestro. He'd do it for Alex, and every other innocent that was on Arcadine. He knew they were somehow all connected. The last thing Felix did before he went to sleep in his bed for the last time was make sure Alex's photo was tucked neatly into the sleeve of his wallet. Tomorrow, he'd head for London.
Sample fight post:

Made no mention if Michael anywhere in your history, he seemed kind of important.


“ tussle with a scrawny kid” from rp sample
The scrawny kid tried to ambush Felix after work as he walked into his car. The scrawny kid didn't know Alex had the sight. After spotting the scrawny kid, Felix rushed to his car and screeched out of the parking lot. The thing must was following close behind on a motorcycle. Felix made sure he had his gloves on before he drove over to one of the bad spots of Nappa. If you looked hard enough, you could find a deserted lot. Felix drove to a deserted lot beside a hotel scheduled for demolition.
Felix parked and turned off his engine before getting out of the car. The thing pulled up right next to him.
“Hey man, I got something for you.” it said.
To the naked eye, the thing looked like a skinny high school kid. Felix activated his sight, feeling the blood well up in his throat. To him, the thing now looked like a mummy with deep blood stained bandages over it's body. Felix spit the blood on the thing's shoes before he punched the thing in the face. It yowled in pain and fell on the floor in surprise, but it was more shocked and wounded and got up pretty quick.
The thing showed Felix the berretta it had wrapped between bandages on it's waist before it pulled out an intimidating looking hunting knife instead. “Only cuz I like you,” it said.
Felix ran. He took off for the hotel. The mummy followed but could barely keep up. Felix was afraid it'd shoot him in the back but it didn't. Entering the building, Felix rushed to the fourth floor and hid inside one of the rooms and closed the door. He waited. It only took about a minute before the thing was coming up the staircase. It was wheezing and out of breath. Felix could have sworn he heard a snarl. That's when Felix called the prepaid cellphone he had planted in the room down the hall earlier that day. The thing rushed down the hall towards the noise, and as quietly as he could, Felix opened the door, aimed and fired all 6 rounds from his stirling into the thing. The mummy fell hard and Felix moved in quick, pummeling the thing in the head, while grabbing for it's gun. His mixed effort gained him the gun but the thing was able to stab him in his left thigh. Pain shot through Felix's body and he almost dropped the gun. With a kick from the thing to his face, he did. The gun sailed somewhere behind him down the hall. Felix limped to a standing position. He could stand, but barely. The thing hobbled towards him shakily. Felix knew he had hurt it pretty bad. Felix limped as fast as he could down the hall, but the thing was right behind him. It was the faster of the two now. The thing stabbed towards Felix's face, and he was able to catch the thing's wrist, purely by luck. Felix aimed for the thing's throat and got a punch in before he pushed the thing back. Felix hoped his punch to the throat killed the thing, but he didn't count on it. Felix limped away and finally, he skirted his way around the pitfall he had made several days ago. The thing hobbled towards Felix. Anger seemed to propel it forward and it seemed to be moving much faster. For a moment the thing stopped near the pitfall and Felix was sure it knew. The thing smiled and picked up the beretta. Felix cursed himself. He didn't see it earlier, and now the thing was going to kill him. The thing turned on Felix with a smile. “Curiosity killed the-” with one misstep, the thing fell forward and down several stories.

K not much to say with combat, This sample is pretty hard ot screw up in itself.


All in all, this sheet can work, But it requires a lot of work, and I wil lsay this now. Please do something different with this format, It is honestly horribly painful to read through, consider using a lot more Enters please especially when you have huge bodies of texts like those samples and the history. I mean, isn't it honestly a lot easier to read with the spaces in it now?

Now while that is the worst problem, grammatically, though I would say the way you have written it is also making it hard to follow, with choppy sentences and skipping around in time all over the place. Spelling isn't an issue though. That was actually very excellent. I would also say that you seem a very skilled writer, and I even enjoyed your sample so much so that I forgot about how hard it was to read for a while. That is still no excuse though.

Nextly we move on to game play problems. If we were to approve this character, then we'd also be approving that drug, and possibly a new monster race, the Staff would have to come together to make a decision on that, at least I imagine we would.

I also realyl need to see a lot more detail added in to some places, like what classifies as an infected individual, people on the drug? And why does it do that to them? Or just monsters in general? And if that is true, does it tell the difference between those monsters if it can detect monsters at all?

Powers need more, especially in the why does he have them area. Didn't really find out where or why he got them, Or why they started to manifest when he was nearly killed. At first I thought it was adrenaline or intense fear. But you specifically mentioned that he didn;t fell any fear at almost dying, So I'm totally lost on that.

The religion thing, The way you've written it is actually insulting to me personally, as your definitely giving off the vibe that religious people are just dicks to those who have homosexual feelings, even going so far as to abandon their children, or nearly, after one incident. I don't know, I just hate that, I really do. I understand that's the stereotype, and it won't stop my approval cause it's your guy, and his family. But I'm throwing this out there.

however, props to you on making an overweight character, It's realistic and very original, and I love it.

So fix it up, and you should be good.

_________________
Almighty Lord, Word of God the Father, Jesus Christ, God and Lord of all creation; who gave to your holy apostles the power to tramp underfoot serpents and scorpions; who along with the other mandates to work miracles was pleased to grant them the authority to say: "Depart, you devils!" and by whose might Satan was made to fall from heaven like lightning; I humbly call on your holy name in fear and trembling, asking that you grant me, your unworthy servant, pardon for all my sins, steadfast faith, and the power - supported by your mighty arm - to confront with confidence and resolution this cruel demon. I ask this through you, Jesus Christ, our Lord and God, who are coming to judge both the living and the dead and the world by fire.
~Exorcism Rite of 1999.

http://duskcrusade.pro-forum.co.uk/t16-father-anthony-diem

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Wed Jan 29, 2014 2:34 pm

Just responding to the line spacinf so far, is there any way to input indents? Originally, i wrote this is open office, and everything was split into paragraphs. I copy/pasted, but i guess it didn't carry over. Is there some way to do this?

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Wed Jan 29, 2014 2:46 pm

Next, I apologize. I had no hostile intent against any religious organization. I'm not an athiest taking a shot at religious organizations, and I'm sorry If you felt offended. I come from an Evangelical Baptist private school and the overarching feeling has always been anything out of the norm and you're pretty much going to hell. With that being said, I've met many individuals that are accepting with homosexuality, etc. My intent was not to criticize religion, but the parents. I intentionally wrote the parents like that because yes, they are not good parents. Will continue working on this.

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Joseph Magnus on Wed Jan 29, 2014 3:16 pm

Yes, You can edit the post you made on the site, Clicking edit above it, and that will bring you to your sheet, but allowing you to change up the wording directly on here. Simply clicking enter on your paragraphs a couple times should do the trick.

No hard feelings Smile

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Joseph Magnus on Wed Jan 29, 2014 3:16 pm

Sorry posted in my Jospeh Account, I'm Anthony.

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by Felix Breche on Tue Feb 11, 2014 11:55 am

Sorry I haven't forgotten about this character, but I'm really busy this semester. I'm still interested in continuing the editing/revision process, but I don't foresee that happening soon. I don't know what the policy is on how long I can keep characters 'WIP' on this site, but I think the earliest I'll be able to give this any attention would be in a few months.

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

Post by John Smith on Tue Feb 11, 2014 1:54 pm

The worst we do is put it in Disapproval. It'll be thee to copy whenever you want to start again.

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Re: Felix Breche (WIP)

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